wink

writing this one before i vanish again in the blue for months to come. idk if this will make it to the blogs but anyways we write and if we dont want it we tear it and throw it away somewhere for words are meant to travel and they do their part in doing so.

so umm… hell i dont have anything in me brain. well you probably mightve seen some new things on the landing page they are quite visible. well im doing my part in keeping myself busy with things i absolutely dont need, also i am out of the gaming habit that i got into i am somehow back like palpatine was. the new strokes album reality awaits dropped like a week or 2 ago and oh god what do i even say. jules sure knows his way around auto-tune the guy has absolutely nailed it. also spider-man bnd came out too and the odyssey as well, chris really put a lot in the odyssey and you can really see it, it was so good and spider-man well its spider-man we all liked it, i wont forgive them tho they made me cry over a emotional fake out.

anyways life is going as it is supposed to go. my 2nd year just started in the university and it is as it is supposed to be, decent enough. well what can i say, somehow it seems all of sudden i have ran out of the juice that makes me want to do different things or i am just being lazy either way i should really put it in the bag and start learning things that i have on my imaginary list. nowadays i somehow find a lot of time to explore myself mentally, i have thoughts then i have thoughts that contradict them and i somehow i am still at peace. maybe because it doesnt affect me in any way, i am somehow fine with having second thoughts i dont think anyone should be worried about the second thoughts they have (if you have em) yolo.

what else… i will put this here i wrote this while i was getting bored in one of the lectures. “my desires are as limited to me as the meaning of everything till i exist. in a very true and close sense to me the only desire ive had is to have a simple life, do a simple job, a job that i myself want to do well not because it pays me but because i like doing it and it pays me just enough that i can do whatever i want to. i want to be… i want to be as free as my thoughts are from the shackles of the reality. my desire has been come to life since long ago. ive and i am already living a simple life. a life with not many complex things, or so i like to think in my head. the only thing left to do is to hold it and hold it together”

this is for a stranger that i like on the bus i take for the university “she reminds me (mostly the look she carries) of me from some time in the past, how i used( like) to be maybe i still am but im changing i guess… no i am evolving, its kinda hard to tell if i like it or not cause i am feeling quite neutral about it. maybe this is why i feel liking to her.” i dont know anything about her not even her name.

god why am i even writing this for (i know) only one guy is going to read it and i dont think anyone reads it or maybe that is what i like to think… (like is quite a weird work idk it feels weird) well anyways be happy cause u have already won, only you can be you.

“wishful thinking at its best the brightest smile, no wonder we met” - benches (when i say this i mean it)